Forbidden Yearning

It sounds so dark doesn’t it? And I swear, to me, the matter doesn’t seem as heavy, however, I’ve always had to mask my desire. What am I talking about? Simply the act of getting a tattoo. Is that worthy enough to elicit a *gasp* from all of you? Yes, I know that our bodies are sacred temples that must not be smeared by images that are somewhat permanent. And yes, I know that as we age, the tattoos will, like our skin, become all wrinkled and ugly. And YES, I was there when Deputy Wright lectured on how tattoos are harmful to our bodies and the needles may not be sterilized.

And yet, I have ALWAYS wanted a tattoo. Does that sound crazy? I think I may have wanted since elementary school. But then again, who hasn’t thought about tattoos when we’re little. But even as I grew older, the yearning for a tattoo overcame all the negatives that were attached to it. Of course I never told my family this, but I also, never broadcast-ed it to any of my friends. I think it’s because the surrounding society deemed a tattoo as trashy or related to gangs. But that is definitely not the case at all. In fact, tattoos can be seen as self-expression, and the ones I’ve seen definitely do not scream “bad apple”.

I think it was just this past year, when I told my best friends (PAACKS) about wanting to get a tattoo. They were talking about getting matching tattoos and all of them just looked at me, expecting me to be, like always, the one who turned down an “adventure”. Thus, they were quite surprised when I revealed my own desires on getting a tattoo and soon. I think after that I’ve told some other people and I’ve gotten a variety of reactions. Some people were cool about it, others were wary, but decided against saying anything. And then other people, like Jennifer, vocally voiced their disgust about getting a tattoo. She actually told me, “A., if you get one, I’ll be disappointed”.

Anyway, I just don’t get why some people get worked over this and why there was this need to hide my yearning from everyone. Wanting a tattoo or even getting one, doesn’t change a person. I won’t suddenly drop out of school as soon as I get a tattoo and I’m pretty sure I’ll still be modest as ever. Just wish I could figure out society for once.

So what design do I want? I want a butterfly. Now wait, I’m not being all girly and childish or whatever. The design I want is different, and I’ve only seen it once. But mark my words, as soon as I find it, I’ll post it everywhere and anywhere I can. There’s a girl in my Woman Studies’ class who has an awesome tattoo of four butterflies flying off, but I don’t think I am mentally or physically strong to have a tattoo artist work on me for that large amount of space. Haha, but whatever happens, I will be getting a tattoo, so if you don’t like it, tough.

<3 A.


2 thoughts on “Forbidden Yearning

  1. Interesting; do it! :D you have to take pictures and show us though. even before you said you wanted a butterfly tattoo on the post, I already felt like that would be the design you would want!

    sensitive one

  2. i want a tattoo too :[ of a dragon wrapped around my chest :D itll be sooooo coool :] but..idk if i can handle it :[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[

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