Here All Alone

Hey kids,

So there are certain people who constantly frustrate me to the point where I’m just ready to surprise them all and just cuss them out. Now if you know me, you’d know that I despise profanity, and it is within the last year that I have started to say “hell”, “damn”, and the occasional “bitch” or “bastard”. But that’s the extent of my expulsive vocabulary. So far, I have maintained my philosophy that I shouldn’t straight out cuss and let out those more vulgar words. I mean, the words I stated above, in my defense, are used in highly acclaimed literature, so it doesn’t make me feel as bad as if I were to progress forward. However, as in the case when I started using the words above, I am being confronted with idiotic people who don’t alleviate my stress but just add on it. And when I say idiotic, I don’t mean these people are plain stupid or mentally inefficient. These are people who just seem to bask in the glory of drama.

Now, drama, I understand, can be enticing sometimes. After all, we are human and therefore have this internal desire to lead exciting lives and be in the center of everything. That’s just an example of egocentrism developed early on in childhood. However, there are certain people who feel the need to ignite it just for the hell of it. It’s as if seeing someone say a casual ‘hi’ isn’t good enough. They need to prove that they know EVERYTHING that goes on and belittle those who are blissfully ignorant.  Like today. I’m pretty stressed out with the IB Biology exam tomorrow. I know that NONE of us are prepared for the IB Bio test and so of course, this consumes me entirely. And yet, as I walk by all tired, with enough sense to just say hello, someone calls me out and says “Don’t say anything”. What do you mean “Don’t say anything”?? What the hell am I not supposed to say? I have NO idea what’s going on. And so she makes this big deal, saying, “come on, let’s walk and talk”. Like I really have time for that. So I tell her to just tell me, and she gives me this bs information that didn’t pertain to me at all. And she’s like, I know you didn’t say anything, just make sure you don’t. Uhhh, so why did you single me out to tell me this when I wasn’t even talking to you? She responds with “Well, you have this reputation . . . ” I think that was the final point for me. I didn’t stop to listen. I just turned around and walked out.

I know what kind of reputation I have, and it’s a good one that I’m proud to keep. I also know that there’s a bunch of  haters and gossip that make you think as if you’re here all alone on this planet. However, I know this isn’t true. And I know this because it is with this knowledge that I find my sensibility and return to my serene state of mind. I know I have a great group of friends who have been by my side since elementary school and who will continue to be with me as we venture into a new chapter of our lives. I know I have some pretty outstanding people as my best friends and who will remain my besties for life. And not only do I have a pretty nice family at home, but I have the BEST Leo family in the world. And with all of that, you realize, that it doesn’t matter if a certain person doesn’t like you or a certain group talks trash about you. Because above that are the people who have always and will always be near and dear to your heart.

<3 A.


5 thoughts on “Here All Alone

  1. mmmhm AMEN sister! you were right to just walk it out; you’re better than those who create drama. and you know what, to all those people that don’t like you or have a problem with you, sometimes, it’s best to say “you know what, that’s their problem, not mine” and leave them in the dust as you just walk away with those LONG legs of yours. :P

  2. hmm.. i didn’t even know such a thing occurred.. =(

    the third paragraph seems like another i believe speech coming on & i’m glad that you looked beyond the situation and realized what wonderful friends you have surrounding you!!

    you do think very positively my dear. although i don’t completely agree with the whole literature using bad words theory..

    i love love you, anantha

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